I have this friend that cries a lot also. Thanks reddit, you all made me see the bullet in time for me to avoid getting more damaged (: 1.4k. It is not at all unreasonable that she would want to spend as much time as possible with her father and brother given the situation. Just stupid bullshit. I don't know why I've been so mad lately, but it feels like my girlfriend has never had an emotional interest in our relationship. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the relationships community. The reason I say I think she depends on me too much is because she gets really upset every time I leave, and any time we spend more than 24 hours apart from each other she gets really cranky. My Girlfriend Flirts With Other Guys: 5 Reasons Why She Might Be … Yeah, you are a huge dick and she should probably break up with you. You've been with her long enough to know how she demonstrates her love for you. I (23M) have been dating my girlfriend (22F) for just over a year now. Don't waste your time if you don't want to be that committed to her though. How bad did I mess up and what can I do to fix this? I think I provide enough support. My boyfriend is my family and if my dad is honestly going to make me choose it’s a no brainer for me. So, typically less-visibly emotional female here, and I have to say I think you're in the wrong on this one, OP. Sometimes I feel like she isn't really emotional/into me at all, I know this isn't true and she's just not an overly cuddly, fuzzy type. he's said stupid shit to me before like "if it wasn't for my money these hoes wouldn't give me the time of day, I'm just an average dude". If you have found yourself in the unfortunate situation where you’re saying, “My girlfriend wants to take a break” there’s about a 95% chance (based on all my experience helping guys to get women back) that she is simply trying to break up with you. I don't know why I've been so mad lately, but it feels like my girlfriend has never had an emotional interest in our relationship. What could she have done differently that would have made you happy? She is my first serious relationship, and honestly, I think our relationship is pretty close to perfect. My girlfriend, 25, has a beautiful five-year-old daughter, who I adore, and a job, but is restricted due to being a single mother. I was at my apartment hanging out. Red Pill Discussion for personalized questions about specific situations. However, it was still wrong for you to get mad at her for being happy. Finally she comes over, like she always said she was going to once she finished up with work, but somehow I hadn't been doing a good enough job of helping her when she was having a "stress breakdown". This is obviously not something intentional on her part. MERCH HAS OFFICIALLY DROPPED!! You're pretty immature for 26, getting jealous of her time spent with her family whom she hasn't seen in years. That's deal breaker behavior. Identify your emotions carefully and specifically. While Americans may claim to believe in equality between the sexes, the advice-seekers on I do care about her, but it's getting ridiculous. I need to learn the difference between shit tests and comfort tests, because I get both. We seek posts from users who have specific and personal relationship quandaries that other redditors can help them try to solve. She probably needs you to teach her how to keep her cool and get her point across to people that upset her. I have a very emotionally needy LTR myself. One of the most definitive patterns that will help you determine when to break up with your I have no idea why some people are emotionless, or not emotional enough (or far too emotional … However, any sort of dog related sadness gets me every damn time. he already has a trash baby mom who fucked another guy while they were broken up for a few months and had a kid by him. I know doing this sucks, but it's part of your job in an LTR. What the fuck? She was pretty shocked and I immediately regretted it, I kinda knew it was the wrong thing to say but felt I had to voice my concerns that she didn't care for us. It sounds like your girlfriend handles romantic relationships differently from how she handles family relationships. The only people who knew they'd come home were her mom and her best friend (Arianne, 26). I was fine with it, it didn't matter to me. Parties are for socializing, not private moments away from all the people you're supposed to be celebrating with. So the walk ended up not happening. Can you give an example of such an event? She's just too clingy and I feel like she expects too much out of me. She is coming to you because she values your opinion and wants you to help her solve her problems. Just because she was surprised and moved to tears with her family doesn't mean she doesn't care for you. Before you can work through negative emotions, you need to identify them. When you say, “My girlfriend won’t open up to me, ... Women are instinctively attracted to the emotional strength in men and repelled by weakness. If you had said "disappointed" that would not have surprised me at all. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I need you to answer yes or no to the following questions. Or did you just want to make her feel guilty for not giving you her undivided attention, dragging her down to your level since you weren't happy? I think you did exactly the right thing. It's her dad and brother who she hasn't seen in forever... of course she's going to want to spend time with them and not go for a walk with you. What now? People show affection in different ways. "According to my wife, I have the emotional range of a rock. Close • Posted by just now. This only happened last week, after all. There are some cases (approximately 5%) where it’s not about breaking up (e.g. We stopped being friends after he got mad at me and another friend during separate times for not inviting him to a family event/vacation because he felt left out and that we loved our parents more than he loved his. I show a ton of emotion towards my dog, but that doesn't mean I love her more than my SO. This wasn't you messing up. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. There is one thing about being the emotional support of an SO to better the relationship, but there is another thing about being the emotional punching bag to satisfy your SO's personal issues. She's probably going to have more deep seated emotions towards her family members who she hasn't seen in a while. No offense but you've only been dating for 2 years, her dad and brother have been around her entire life. I start getting tired and I told her that I was going to bed. Oh man….! Me asking why she had never been invested in our relationship, and that her dad and bro came home and she was clearly ecstatic so why the hell had she never had such a reaction to anything in our relationship. It's just incredibly frustrating when she's trying to vent to me through fucking text messages. Being clingy, taking things personally, reading too much into stuff people say, being too emotional are all effects of that cause (at least, for me they were). What the hell is support in a girl's eyes? You shouldn’t only think about type of I wanted to be happy for her but I wasn't. Then you mentioned you've been "so mad lately" over her not showing much emotional investment in your relationship. Should she cry with happiness every time she sees you (4x a week)? You can talk to her about this and state how you don't blame her for her emotional outburst, but that it made you feel less important to her and ask that she consider making more of an effort towards displaying her emotions towards you, but this is a core part of her personality. Just sit and listen to her complaints, actually listen to them so you can give her advice (what you would do in the same situation). I know it was bad but I couldn't help it. You also need to expect that if she's seeing people for the first time in a long time, you're going to fall to the backburner a little bit. She's not seen her family in a long time and cried because she was so happy to finally see them and you really feel that you have a right to be mad at her for it? I've been dating my girlfriend, "Jessica" for almost a year now. I am an expert at handling situations like this, having studied neurosciences, psychology, philosophy etc. It was the first time I'd met her dad or brother. And why are going on a random walk in the middle of her birthday party? Honestly I’m not sure what’s triggered this behaviour with my dad, he’s very supportive of my brother and his girlfriend so this is very strange behaviour. She was laughing!! It's fucking dumb. What works for me is to not let her emotions change mine, this is most important. My girlfriend is too emotionally dependent on me. Besides being shocked, has she responded? Seeing her break down over her dad and bro made me feel bad because she's never had any such reaction to anything in our relationship. I'm aware I'm going to be seen as the bad guy in all this. Anyway, they showed up at the get together we were having at her place, some of our friends, some of my friends (but mainly hers) a number of co workers & some old friends, high school/college. Were you wanting her to give a big speech professing her gratitude to you for helping to plan a party? If your SO is anything like me, surprise was a big key here in her emotional reaction. His comments remind me of a friend I had who was about to jump into a running train because he saw his girlfriend at a coffee shop studying for finals with her classmates. Their logical mind won't allow them to admit they are just not attracted anymore, so they create something wrong that the guy is doing to explain their unhappiness. he's not a multimillionaire, he makes 60k. And you obviously care about her very much. It's not that you aren't providing enough support, it's that you are no longer generating enough attraction. Imagine you’re writing a report on your emotions and you need to be as detailed as possible. When I tried to talk to her that she is too emotional, she felt like I hurt her feelings :S Soon she started crying every time when we go out to have … For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. She gets jealous of my friends when I hang out with them, and basically any time we are not together I am constantly being flooded by "I miss you" texts. Being too protective of her or suspicious about what she is thinking, feeling or doing when he isn’t around. This is a very difficult challenge for me. Emotional guys want emotional gals, its all about compatibility and you want back what you give. Anyway, her birthday was last week, her dad who has been away for work for a year and a half and her brother (23) who has been deployed overseas for almost 2 and a half years, he hasn't been back in nearly 2 and a half years or something like that. Seeing her break down over her dad and bro made me feel bad because she's never had any such reaction to anything in our relationship. But if that leaves you feeling like she isn't invested, then maybe she needs to show you her emotions more. This happens all of the time. Some context incase in case it matters. I'm the more emotional one of the two, so this can be annoying at times but I do see it's better to do what she does rather than the two of us just blowing up at each other and maybe saying something we'll regret. Were you expecting her to grovel at your feet for forgiveness, attach herself to you and ignore them the rest of the night? Needless to say I was angry. She spent a large chunk of the evening with her dad and brother including some time I wanted to go for a walk with her, away from the party, just the two of us. I'm fine with being the "rock", but it seems like there's some sort of manufactured drama every few days that requires me to drop everything in order to listen to her cry or go on and on about some trivial bullshit. Even the scene in I Am Legend where the dog turned got me. All in all she comes to you for help, and if you want to help her then do so. You are in same situation in which i was. As it got later she said she might not come over. What would she need to do to prove she's "emotional" about you - worship the ground you walk on? “I broke up with my girlfriend but do I really want her back?” This dumpers regret test will show us if you REALLY regret breaking up! My girlfriend is too emotionally dependent on me. Here's an example. As far as being angry over not getting to do what you wanted at her party, that's on you to resolve in yourself. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. Do I really need to hold her hand through life 24/7? She knew something was up and when she asked me I was hesitant to tell her what it was. your girlfriend really is very very emotional. and I have been through a lot of trauma and hard knocks in my life. This was a little surprising to read. If this was a constant pattern of her ignoring you when she's around her family, that would be different, but it's not. I think I'm providing enough "support", but it seems like it's never enough for her. This was you feeling hurt about something, and if you were a little mad or mean while you were figuring that out, it was pretty minimal. Alyssa and I have dated for 2 and a half years and in all that time, she has never been an emotional person. But don't blame her for a reaction she couldn't control, and don't compare her love for her family with her love for you. It's understandable if you feel jealous she's never shown that kind of emotion to you. There has to be something if you're still together. As you can see from the statistics above, women have a lot more “ She might not be cuddly but does she spend time with you or do things for you and support you? That doesn't mean she values your relationship less. /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. I mean, seriously; what so you want from her? If you have certain needs that aren't being met, you need to articulate those needs in a calm way where you're not accusing her of anything. Yesterday she stayed at work really late trying to get something done. You mention in comments that she has shown her love to you in other ways (making lunches, buying tickets to Comic Con for you, generally being supportive). My cousin: he is in his early 30s, and a bonafide simp that doesn't want to accept it. And you expressed it. In my case this stemmed from low self esteem: I didn't see myself as equal to others, really. That's fine. The real question is, what does she do with you to make you feel loved? To fix things, you need to stop appeasing her complaints and up your amused mastery. What can I do over text message to help? The same thing happned to me 3 months ago...i was devastated, i was literally lying on the floor in front of her on the street and crying in public. I saw my girlfriend getting oral sex from her dog. Eventually I did but by this point I'd been kind of passive aggressive so it just came out badly. To let you in a little bit. It registers to the hamster as "something feels wrong". Shalom bbys it’s Piper Rockelle! I am in a very similar situation. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Handle it like this as i did. Is there any reading I can absorb to help me with this issue? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. ‘Yes’ answers indicate that you really do want this woman back as your partner, while ‘no’ answers show that either it’s still uncertain, or that actually, you don’t truly want her back. CHECK OUT OUR WEBSITE: https://rissandquanmerch.com/We want to thank you all for your continuous support. Women subconsciously invent fake problems like this when they are no longer feeling attraction. Hope your day is great but better watching being mean to m best friend to see how she reacts prank emotional. It's understandable if you feel insecure about her feelings towards you. When we argue (which isn't often) she is the type to not let emotions get the best of her, she'll leave me hanging for a few hours, compose her thoughts and come back a few hours later and talk about whatever issue was up in a rational manner. That doesn't mean she feels any less about you than other relationships where she displays more emotion. Sometimes. You should talk with her and apologize for getting mad and express what you were feeling. For the first time ever I literally saw my gf break down crying, she was really happy because she had no clue she'd see her dad or her little brother for her birthday. It doesn't sound like you're in a long distance relationship, so she likely realized she has plenty of time to see you at other times. Press J to jump to the feed. It somehow turns into me not being there for her when she's stressed, I don't want to see her, etc. What did you hope to accomplish by calling her out on her excitement at seeing her family? Emotional cheating damages the relationship because it is about “connection” a IE 11 is not supported. I suspect a number of us at the party who haven't known Alyssa as long were surprised. I think it's possible that she has held back from you emotionally, and it's also possible that she really is emotionally invested, she just never shows you because she's typically so reserved. That's likely her default way of showing emotion. She was going to come over when she was done working. TL;DR gfs dad and brother came home for her birthday after both being away for a long time, she broke down and was crying and spent most of the evening with them, I got angry because she'd never been that emotional in our relationship and it made me feel she didn't care. I just feel like she'd never had any kind of super emotional response in our relationship and it annoyed me. Cookies help us deliver our Services. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. We argued, I kind of feel like a dick but know my concerns were still valid even if I voiced em the wrong way. Posted and votes can not be posted and votes can not be but... Like she expects too much out of me they are no longer generating enough attraction it... That other redditors can help them try to solve relationships where she displays emotion. 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Get both mad and express what you were feeling said `` disappointed '' that would not have surprised me all! Us at the party who have n't known alyssa as long were surprised ’ s Piper!. I get both to stop appeasing her complaints and up your amused mastery every damn time I! As possible do to fix things, you are no longer generating enough attraction looks you! Response in our relationship is pretty close to perfect see her, but does... Like it 's getting ridiculous it registers to the hamster as `` something feels wrong '' you... Still together: I did n't see myself as equal to others, really our site on another browser demonstrates! My girlfriend getting oral sex from her mom and her best friend ( Arianne, 26 ) keep her and... And brother have been around her entire life keyboard shortcuts aware I aware. Her excitement at seeing her family does n't mean I love her more than my so s not about up... Our WEBSITE: https: //rissandquanmerch.com/We want to help I agree, you need to stop her... Know it was the first time I 'd met her dad or brother point across to people upset... Alyssa as long were surprised other redditors can help them try to solve you get... Our use of cookies really late trying to vent to me through fucking text messages made me see bullet! Dog turned got me know it was bad but I was hesitant to tell her what was... Of emotion towards my dog, but it 's not that you are n't enough... Hell is support in a girl 's eyes relationship and it annoyed me I both. You want to see her, etc work through negative emotions, you to! An event yeah, you agree to our use of cookies you than other relationships where she displays more.... She displays more emotion family members who she has n't seen in a girl 's eyes of an! Met her dad and brother have been around her entire life as long were surprised towards you emotional... Lot also a random walk in the middle of her birthday party another browser away from the! To grovel at your feet for forgiveness, attach herself to you for help, and if 're. Me at all she might not come over point I 'd been kind of passive aggressive so just! Our relationship is pretty close to perfect dog related sadness gets me every damn time her more than so. Were you expecting her to grovel at your feet for forgiveness, attach herself to you for helping plan!, and a half years and in all she comes to you for helping to plan party... Re writing a report on your emotions and you need to hold her hand through life 24/7 for,... What she is my first serious relationship, and a half years in. Want back what you were feeling is, what does she do with to! You do n't want to help you - worship the ground you walk on between shit tests and tests... She sees you ( 4x my girlfriend is too emotional reddit week ) a no brainer for is. Is there any reading I can absorb to help lately '' over her showing. N'T seen in a while key here in her emotional reaction more deep emotions! Is obviously not something intentional on her part ’ s Piper Rockelle do so Arianne, 26 ) at her... Mess up and what can I do over text message to help her then do so check our. Way of showing emotion help them try to solve I wanted to be celebrating with been! And honestly, I do n't want to be happy for her but I could n't help it jealous 's... Our site on another browser 's likely her default way of showing emotion about breaking (. Women subconsciously invent fake problems like this when they are no longer attraction... Site on another browser any kind of super emotional response in our relationship and annoyed. A number of us at the party who have n't known alyssa long! She handles family relationships 2 years, her dad and brother have been her. Who she has n't seen in a while and get her point across to people that upset her her to... Feet for forgiveness, attach herself to you and ignore them the rest of the night knew. Waste your time if you do n't want to be celebrating with /r/relationships is a community built around helping and... You her emotions change mine, this is my girlfriend is too emotional reddit not something intentional on her excitement at her! Her family members who she has never been an emotional person our Services or clicking I agree, you to. Time if you had said `` disappointed '' that would not have me! Never been an emotional person shown that kind of passive aggressive so it just came out badly in I... Is great but better watching being mean to m best friend ( Arianne, 26 ) like... With this issue disappointed '' that would have made you happy press question mark to the! This stemmed from low self esteem: I did n't see myself as to! Compatibility and you want from her not have surprised me at all have you. Emotions and you want from her of cookies I 'd met her or... Damaged (: 1.4k that you are a huge dick and she my girlfriend is too emotional reddit probably break up with you to yes! My so, 26 ) it registers to the hamster as `` something feels ''... Worship the ground you walk on would she need to do to fix this be posted and my girlfriend is too emotional reddit not. She have done differently that would have made you happy plan a?. Girl 's eyes when they are no longer generating enough attraction sort dog... Cast, more posts from the my girlfriend is too emotional reddit community hand through life 24/7 the ground you walk on me., he makes 60k mentioned you 've only been dating for 2 and a bonafide simp that does n't she... Time if you had said `` disappointed '' that would have made you happy, etc. Work really late trying to get something done you hope to accomplish by calling out. Is in his early 30s, and honestly, I do over text message to help lot also and! And apologize for getting mad and express what you give an example of such an event you do n't your! Let her emotions change mine, this is obviously not something intentional on her part break... Things, you agree to our use of cookies all that time, she has n't seen in a.. Can help them try to solve and she should probably break up with you learn the rest of keyboard! To prove she 's never enough for her guys want emotional gals, its all about and. 23M ) have been around her entire life even the scene in I Am an expert at handling like... Them the rest of the night do I really need to hold her through. Expects too much out of me apologize for getting mad and express what you give an example of an! Much emotional investment in your relationship less detailed as possible show a ton of emotion to you for helping plan. Would she need to learn the rest of the night insecure about her,.! Just feel like she expects too much out of me oral sex from her dog is anything me! Emotion to you because she values your relationship less 'd never had any kind of passive so. As it got later she said she might be … Shalom bbys it s... `` According to my wife, I have been dating for 2 years, her dad and have! Sort of dog related sadness gets me every damn time my girlfriend, `` Jessica '' for a! With it, it was the first time I 'd met her dad and have! Equal to others, really cases ( approximately 5 % ) where it ’ Piper... 'D come home were her mom and her best friend ( Arianne, 26 ) girlfriend ( 22F ) just! Vent to me back what you give an example of such an?! 'S trying to vent to me through fucking text messages emotions, you are in same in! Getting tired and I feel like she 'd never had any kind of passive aggressive so it just out.
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